Captive Princess: A Dark Paranormal Romance (Feline Royals Book 2) Page 13

  I couldn’t blame either of them. Gabor was beautiful, and Camila was the sweet one, the innocent one, the pretty one. They were a match. I was the hot mess. I wasn’t mate material for an ocelot. Now that I was back with the group, I had to remember my place in it. I was simply an instrument for getting the amulets and getting Camila to the throne. If Father thought I’d been ruined after seducing Lord Balam, well, there wasn’t a man in the Ocelot Kingdom who would take me after what I’d done with him, and Shadow, and Sir Kenosi.

  Gabor was among the men who would want nothing to do with me—not that he ever would have. It wasn’t just that I was human, and he was more than that. I’d already told him how I felt, and he’d told me he didn’t—couldn’t—feel the same.

  I squared my shoulders and addressed the guard properly. “Thank you for your continuing, exemplary service.”

  “Your Grace,” he said, stepping aside and gesturing for me to enter.

  I rushed in to find Camila sitting on a narrow bed with a plain, drab comforter. The room looked like a hotel room, too. There was a small bathroom near the door, and a tiny kitchenette area with a coffee pot, sink, microwave, and a cabinet.

  “I see you’ve deigned to visit us,” Camila said, crossing her arms and glaring.

  I stopped short, blinking at her in surprise. I had been so eager to see her that I hadn’t properly considered how she might feel about me right now. She nodded to a small screen that showed an empty, enormous bed with a white canopy.

  My heart nearly stopped. “Is that—What is that?”

  “It’s your room,” she said. “While you were living in luxury, being wined and dined by the movie star, we’ve been taking shifts sleeping on a single bed.”

  “I… I’m sorry?” I said, not knowing what else to say. Apparently, they hadn’t shown her everything. Another thought slammed into me, and I nearly doubled over and lost my steak dinner. What if she’d missed some of the things that happened in that room because it had been Gabor’s shift in the room? Had he seen my performance with Kenosi near the elevator? Did he know it wasn’t by choice?

  In truth, though, I had enjoyed every encounter I’d had with the infuriating, impossible playboy. My face burned at the thought, and I couldn’t even look in Gabor’s direction.

  Color rose to Camila’s cheeks, and I realized she thought my blush was an admission of the luxurious state I’d been living in while she stayed in this utilitarian room.

  “Did you get the amulet?” she asked through clenched teeth.

  “No,” I admitted. When Kenosi offered me my friends, I’d jumped at the chance so fast I’d forgotten what it had all been for. Shame burned through me at the realization of what I’d done, and with nothing more gained than what I’d had to start with.

  “I can’t believe you,” Camila fumed, jumping up from the bed. “Here I was, listening to your lover when he said not to reveal my identity to the cheetahs. I bet you were both in on it. Just eating up all that attention, those fancy dinner parties and clothes. But it was all a lie, Itzel. He wasn’t trying to impress you. That whole time, he thought you were the heir. He was trying to impress me.”

  “That’s not what he was doing,” I started.

  “Well, guess what?” Camila said, continuing like I’d never spoken. “I’m going to tell him. I’m going to tell him you’re just a common human, and I’m the queen. I’m going to tell him that you tricked him all that time. Then we’ll see where you sleep tonight.”

  “That’s really not a good idea,” Lord Balam said.

  “I’m done listening to you,” Camila said, rounding on him. “You’re not on my side. You’ve never been on my side. You’re on her side.”

  “Your Grace,” Gabor said. “I don’t think Sir Kenosi is the sort of man whose attention you want to catch.”

  Camila planted her hands on her hips, her nostrils flaring and her eyes narrowing to slits. “You’re supposed to be on my side, Gabor. You’re supposed to look out for me. But I’m seriously beginning to doubt where your loyalty lies.”

  Gabor’s face blanched, but he clenched his jaw and didn’t speak.

  “Camila,” I said. “He’s right. You really don’t want to go up there.”

  “I’m done with everyone ganging up on me,” she said. “I’m the true princess. If none of you will treat me like it, I’m sure Sir Kenosi will.” She pushed past Gabor and Lord Balam, who stood in her path to the door.

  “I will escort you,” Gabor said, but Camila wheeled around, her eyes flashing.

  “You’ve done enough,” she hissed. “You don’t have my best interest in mind after all. You’re as much a liar as Itzel.” She whipped around and marched out.

  Twenty-Five

  “Camila,” I called, hurrying after my sister. “You can’t go up there. Sir Kenosi is a monster.”

  She almost choked on her laughter, but she didn’t slow. “A monster who put you up in the best room in his palace while I slept in the servants’ quarters like a commoner.” She spit the last word out like it described trash instead of her own sister.

  Suddenly a figure towered over me. I hadn’t even heard a door open, but Shadow stood blocking my path. He reached out like he might touch me, then drew back, disbelief written all over his face. “Itzel?” he asked in his papery, hoarse voice. “Is that really you?”

  “It’s really me,” I said. “But I really need to stop my sister before she does something dangerous.”

  “More dangerous?” he asked, without a trace of a smile. “Let her go, Itzel. She won’t listen to you. She won’t listen to anyone.”

  “I know my sister,” I said. “If I tell her what really happened…”

  “Like I’d believe you,” Camila called from the end of the hall, where she was stepping into the elevator. I pushed past Shadow and sprinted on my legs, which felt only barely useable after not eating for so long. The lunch had given me strength, but not enough. I barely reached the elevator as the doors slid closed.

  Without thinking, I thrust my arm through the crack before it sealed shut. “Camila, listen to me,” I panted. “He’s not what you think. He’s basically made himself king of this country, and all the women are his sex slaves.”

  “I bet you enjoyed that,” she said, hitting a button. Our eyes met, and the coldness I saw there shocked me. The elevator started moving, and I wrenched at my arm, yelping in pain as it was dragged upward. Suddenly the elevator shuddered, and a pair of hands appeared below my arm, gripping the metal sides that held it fast. The metal squealed as it slowly bent, unclamping from my arm. Camila shrieked in fear, and my heart lurched with the instinctual urge to protect her.

  But she wasn’t my ally anymore.

  I fell backward against Gabor’s chest as he released the elevator. The doors slid closed around the bent edge, and the car slid upward and out of sight.

  “She hates me,” I whispered. All I could do was sag against the guard, reeling with pain. I barely felt my arm. It was the hole caving in inside my chest that consumed me.

  Gabor scooped me up into his arms, carrying me back to the room he shared with Camila as if he were a conquering hero, and I was his captured bride. Except he hadn’t conquered me. My sister had. That coldness in her eyes made her look more like a snake than a cat. I’d seen her level diplomats with it, but never me. She’d never looked at me that way.

  I had been on her side, had her back through everything since we were kids, even before Mom died. I had loved her and supported her, had built my life around hers. I had grown around her like a tree growing around a fence, accommodating for her weaknesses and hiding her flaws. I had done it all for her, loving her with unwavering fierceness for exactly who she was. If I was her backbone, she was my heart. And now she was cutting herself free of me, and it felt like she was tearing my chest open while I was still alive, spreading my ribcage and letting birds peck out my insides.

  “Princess Itzel,” Gabor said, setting me down on the bed. “Can I get you anyt
hing?”

  “No,” I said, clinging to his neck and not caring how pathetic I sounded. “Just hold me.”

  His body remained rigid, but after a second, one hand rested tentatively on my hip. “Your Grace…”

  “Stay,” I whispered.

  His head turned ever so slightly, his face brushing against my hair, and I felt his slow inhalation. His fingers tightened on my waist, and he lifted his head, turning away. “I can’t,” he said, his voice strangled. “Let me go, Princess.”

  I didn’t think anything could make the pain worse, but I was wrong. I squeezed my eyes closed, feeling the tears wet my lashes. I couldn’t watch him go.

  Twenty-Six

  I heard the door close quietly, and then the tears came. I curled onto my side, holding the middle of me as if I could keep it from imploding. I didn’t hear the door again, but suddenly, Shadow was standing over me. Lord Balam pushed past him and slid onto the bed, curling his body around mine, holding me steady as I shook and sobbed. Shadow slipped over me, melting onto the bed in front of me, curling up to match my position, his knees pressed to mine, his forehead against my damp forehead, his hands wrapping around mine as if to anchor me.

  I didn’t know if anything could ever anchor me again, though. A month ago, I’d had all the roots a girl could want. I’d had a home, a family, even if things with Father had never been ideal. I’d had a man I loved, one I’d planned to spend the rest of my life with. I’d had a sister I loved, who loved me and trusted me, and a position in court lined up for me that would last a lifetime. I’d had a nation I believed in, one I was proud to help rule.

  Now, I had none of that. I’d disgraced Father. The man I’d loved so hard, so innocently, was dead. The dream I’d had of being an advisor looked more unreachable every day. In truth, I wasn’t even sure I wanted it unless I could make major changes, reach out to the other nations and help them in a way the isolationist ocelots never had. And worst of all, I’d lost my sister. It was like losing the best part of myself. Without her, I would never feel truly complete. She was my other half—my better half.

  I lay there for a long while, crying too hard to be ashamed of my tears. I’d heard crying was supposed to make you feel better, but I always tried to avoid it, not wanting to look weak. But now that I’d let go, shown my weakness, I didn’t feel better at all. I felt as if my chest had been hollowed out and scraped raw, leaving an ache as relentless as a toothache.

  “Where’s Gabor?” I asked at last.

  “He ran off after your sister,” Lord Balam said.

  A fresh tear leaked out at the mention of Camila. I wiped it away, realizing what a mess I must look. “Sorry,” I said, sitting up and wiping my face with my tank top. “You really didn’t have to stay and watch me ugly cry.”

  “It’s not ugly,” Shadow said, sitting up beside me, his long legs folded beside him.

  “Then you obviously had your eyes closed and didn’t see it,” I said, laughing a little. “I swear I’m not usually such a baby.”

  “Crying doesn’t make you weak,” Lord Balam said, prying a lock of hair from my sticky cheek and tucking it behind my ear. “It’s just an expression of emotion. You’re hurt. You cried. There’s no shame in it. It just is.”

  “How’d you get so wise?” I asked, leaning my head on his shoulder.

  “Years of being unwise taught me how,” he said. “Now, you want to tell us what happened to you over the past week?”

  “Not really,” I said, running my thumbnail along the seam on the outside of my jeans. “But I guess I should at least give you the basics.”

  “We all know you weren’t relaxing in splendor,” Lord Balam murmured, running his palm in slow circles over my back. “And even if you had been, after the last month, we wouldn’t have blamed you. There’s no shame from us, Itzel. We’re here for you.”

  “But I failed,” I said with a sigh. “I didn’t get the amulet.”

  “You will.”

  I opened my mouth to ask whether he’d asked the oracle, but I decided against it. The conviction in his voice was enough for me. I didn’t need to know where he’d gotten it.

  “Thank you,” I said, taking a deep breath before diving in. I told them an abbreviated version of the story, but even that version had Lord Balam steaming mad. Shadow sat quietly beside me, his arm resting lightly around my back. “How am I supposed to get the amulet now?” I asked. “I’ve already given him everything.”

  “Not everything,” Shadow said in his low, growly voice.

  I turned to him. “Did you not hear my story? I gave him everything, including my dignity. I didn’t even ask for the amulet. There’s no way he’s going to just hand it over for nothing.” I jumped up, staggering with the thought that had hit me. “Oh my god. He’s going to make Camila take my place. What’s better than fucking a princess? Fucking two.”

  “You didn’t give him the other amulets,” Shadow said.

  I spun to face him. “What do you mean? There’s no point trading one amulet for another. I’d just need him to give me the panther amulet instead of the cheetah amulet.”

  “I didn’t mean you’d let him keep it,” Shadow said.

  “Oh.” I stared at him a long moment. In all the chaos since I’d gotten the panther amulet, I’d never even found out what it did.

  “The panther amulet is very powerful,” Shadow rasped. “It shows a feline his True Mate.”

  “You think he’ll trade his amulet for that?”

  “Shifters go their whole lives searching,” he said. “To see her, to have her marked as his mate… Most people would do anything for that.”

  “Come on, then,” I said. “What are we waiting for? We need to get up there before anything bad happens. Fuck, I hope Gabor got her in time.” I couldn’t help being concerned for her, even if she hated me. I couldn’t undo the years of worrying about her. I couldn’t change the fact that I still worried, still loved, even if she didn’t.

  “She doesn’t listen to him, either,” Shadow said. “She’s a problem, Itzel. She’s reckless, and it puts us all in danger. You wouldn’t have been hurt, been put in that clinic, if we hadn’t had to rescue her from the attack back home.”

  “It’s too late to do anything about that,” I said. “But you’re right. She has no idea what danger she’s in right now.”

  “She needs to go home,” Lord Balam said.

  I felt like a traitor as I stared at him, realizing that my sister was right this time. I wasn’t on her side. She wanted to stay, and I knew that she couldn’t. We’d never finish the tour if Sir Kenosi got hold of her. She’d be broken not just for this trip, but forever. I had to protect her even if she didn’t want me to. No matter what she said or how much she hurt me, I would always want her to be safe.

  But plotting to send her home from her own Amulet Tour, to take it over and do it for her, felt like the shadiest thing I’d ever done. No wonder she thought I’d betrayed her. I was obviously capable of that kind of deviousness.

  “No,” I said. “I can’t do that. It’s her tour. I’m just a strategist. Now, if we want to get Kenosi to bargain with us, we need the panther amulet. It must be in this room somewhere.”

  I planted my hands on my hips and scanned the room quickly, searching for a place she would stow something so precious. Had she used it to see her True Mate? Probably not. After seeing what the jaguar amulet did, she probably wouldn’t risk it. Even if Shadow had told her what it did—and I doubted he had—she wouldn’t trust him enough to believe it.

  “Why did you give it to her?” Shadow asked, looked down at his hands dangling between his knees. Even the way he sat was so animal, so primal, as if he could rise from the bed and be in panther form by the time he stood.

  “It’s hers,” I said.

  “She took the amulet and tried to ditch you in Florida. Why are you getting the next one for her?”

  “That’s not what happened,” I said, dropping my hands and slumping in defeat. “I o
verstepped. Camila didn’t want me on her tour. She sent me home.”

  Shadow blinked at me, incomprehension written across his strong, angular features. “But you already got two amulets for her. How can she think you’re unsuited?”

  I shrugged. “I’m human, for one. And for another, it’s not my tour. She gets to decide who goes with her.”

  “I wouldn’t have given the amulet to her,” Shadow said.

  “Isn’t that kind of the point?” I said. “It sounds like you’re supposed to trick it from everyone.”

  “You think Camila’s going to be able to trick anyone?” Lord Balam asked.

  “It doesn’t matter what I think,” I said. “It’s not my tour.”

  We stood there in silence for a minute.

  “She’ll forgive you when she needs you,” Lord Balam said at last.

  “What does that mean?” I asked, bristling at the insult to Camila.

  “You do too much for your sister,” he said. “You could have been killed in Florida.”

  “He’s not a killer,” I said, gesturing at Shadow.

  “I wasn’t talking about him,” Lord Balam said. “But we didn’t know that at the time, either. And you didn’t know Kenosi wasn’t. You sacrifice yourself for her. Not just your body. Your happiness.”

  “I’m happy,” I said.

  He and Shadow wore identical, sober expressions as they waited for me to admit I’d just been sobbing my guts out over her. Still, I was a happy person. At least, I had been. Even a happy person could be sad when their life was spun upside down and turned inside out.

  “If she tried to send you home, maybe we should just leave,” Shadow said. “Let her get the amulets herself.”

  “No,” I said. “No way. She won’t survive it.”

  “Then she has no business being queen.”

  I glared at him for a long minute. At last I had to drop my gaze from his burning green eyes. “I’m not going to let her get herself killed,” I said. “Maybe you’re right about her. But part of what you said is she’s a danger to herself. And I’m her sister. It’s my job to protect her, even if she hates me for it right now. You don’t have to help me if you don’t want. But I can’t live with myself if I don’t at least try to help her.”